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When coming to relationships,
something to fear:
Imagining virtues
That aren’t really there.

Relationship “red flags”
none can ye afford;
Lest you desire to be visited
In a psychiatric ward.

Honest grown folks will tell you
though you may not quite agree:
“It’s better to be single
than married unhappily.”

Leave relationships alone
Till you know what you need;
And you’re willing to work for it
with five times less speed.

With human relationships
Something must be wrong;
The best part comes first(?),
and they don’t last too long…

There are too many stories
of hireling pastors
Who are counselling persons
into marital disasters.

Many marriage counsellors
will with fantasy entice;
But they won’t live with the consequences
of their foolish advice.

Marriage is still best
for long life and satisfaction;
But your criteria for choosing
must be more than mere attraction!

(If you’ve missed any of the couplets
there’s no need to worry;
I’ll compile them in a blog post
for their posterity. 🙂 )

Bees are attracted to flowers,
then they fly away;
Relationships based on attraction
tend to end the same way.

It is true Jesus said
to love your enemies;
But He didn’t say marry them,
so don’t do that, please.

“Two cannot walk together,
lest they both agree”
Good relationship counsel
found in Amos 3:3.

Here’s some relationship advice,
and this you should keep:
“Only that which was sown
is what you can reap.”

If a person sows falsehood,
discord, discontent;
Can’t expect a great marriage…
but rather, torment.

“So what do we look for
in a potential partner, Uncle Brent?”
Good question, my young friend:
Look for someone who’s content.

“Godliness with contentment”:
The right stage for ethics;
Just more wonderful counsel
found in 1 Timothy 6:6.

Childhood days are good days…
I did enjoy my own;
But marriage isn’t for children…
they should leave it alone.

Three cheers for diligent parents!
Yes, kudos to them.
For they’re the ones solving
the relationship problem.

Marriage is still honourable!
Some say: “No… makes no sense.”
But you can’t knock the recipe
using faulty ingredients.

Weddings come and weddings go,
A dozen for a dime;
Unless you are a wholesome mate
You’d better take your time.

I expect to see blue when I look in the sky,
In the forest I would expect green;
But if I see red flags in relationships,
I’m ‘excepting’ myself from the scene. 😀

Some may say: “These couplets are a bit strong…”
And yes, some do have a sting;
Which do you prefer though: hard sayings now,
Or harder times after the wedding?

Mango is a wonderful fruit you know
Quite healthy… tastes good, to the seed.
Mango season is coming soon!
Ok… back to our regular read.

Prosperity pastors be rinsing my ears
About “having my best life now”…
Do you see prosperous relationships when you look around?
This should raise an eyebrow…

Wisdom should be the principal thing,
Ancient knowledge can provide a good template;
How about some time-tested values that work?
Nah, some just prefer to wing it…

Scrutinize carefully from whom you take advice,
There are false preachers at every nook;
They’ll tell you the world, all you want to hear!
Just enough for a sale of their book.

People have great discernment when choosing a phone,
a laptop or even a mouse;
No problem with that. But where does it go
when it’s time for choosing a good spouse?

There are biblical criteria for choosing a spouse
They’re tough, but solid through and through;
It’s amazing: so much bogus criteria exists.
Are we waiting for science to “research” that too?

Something’s seriously wrong with a community
No matter how friendly or nice,
Where they encourage young persons to get married
Without giving good examples or advice.

Well here is couplet number 30!
Should I go about twenty more?
‘Cause I’ve only just scratched the surface,
And there’s plenty munition in store.

In biblical times, men would get married
when most aspects of his life were in order;
Because we’ve ignored the wisdom of that
we have marriages in chaos and disorder.

You know what we should explain to our young people today?
The solemnity of a marriage vow.
If people truly understood what it means
far fewer would be making them now.

Read Ecclesiastes 5, verses 1 through 7,
Good vow-making principles are found there;
In short: Don’t make promises you’re not able to keep!
Excuses aren’t worth anything here.

In a wife you want kindness,
patience, a potential great mom…
If parents didn’t plant those values,
Where will you be getting them from?

In a husband you want leadership
responsibilities – he won’t shirk;
If he had no good role models,
How exactly do you expect this to work?

Considering marrying someone?
Here’s a test – it’s one-of-a-kind!
Ask yourself: “Can I live with this person,
if I unfortunately became blind?”

There are many relationships in turmoil,
Many seemingly under a curse;
When faced with an important decision,
They chose “forward” instead of “reverse”.

Covering up marital problems
is a strategy that doesn’t work well;
Many may not be able to suspect…
But you cannot get rid of the smell.

Rich weddings and poor marriages
seem to be a worldwide trend.
A low-cost wedding and a prosperous marriage,
won’t that be more prudent in the end?

“Husbands love your wives, as
Christ loved the church…”
This is the best spiritual plan;
Have to die to yourself, before you die for someone,
And this most just don’t understand.

There is love, then there’s infatuation:
Can you distinguish the two?
Well in one, imagination answers
all the questions for you.

Eat an unripe mango…
it will scratch up your mouth;
Wed an unripe partner
and things soon will go South…

What a great disservice that we give our youth
Giving marital fantasies wild;
Then after the wedding, they go radio silent
When they realize that they married a child.

Life has some simple principles;
Here’s one on which to chew:
A person who lies to him/herself
Can’t tell the truth to you.

Boyfriend/girlfriend setups? Can’t condone.
Much energy they waste;
Instead maximize your singleness;
When ready, move with haste.

From birth we’ve been fed marital fantasies,
and from these we must decidedly shift;
Lest you end up in marital drudgery:
it’s a terrible burden to lift.

Commercial break: I make Handmade Soap
Organic, and chemical free.
If you’re interested, please send a message!
And now back to our regularly poetry.

I’ve been noting in modern-day pastors:
They’re more comedic than earlier years;
And until they add back the true gospel,
I’ll be surely subtracting my ears.

Mary had a little lamb,
I never knew its name;
It seems she chose the single life,
and avoided the divorce game.

Humpty Dumpty, egg of fame;
What causeth thee to fall?
Hope not a bad marriage, my dear egg,
That’d be the worst of all.

Sing a song of common-sense,
A pocket full of truth…
Don’t make foolish mistakes as
you trod the road of youth.

Three little pigs, they built their homes:
One straw, one sticks, one brick;
But if you build a house with lies
It will fall record-quick.

“Unless the Lord doth build a house,
They laboureth in vain…”
Still biblical, timeless advice,
Designed to save you pain.
— Psalm 127:1

Your Bible can’t do much for you
if it sits there on your shelf;
Go get the wisdom that you need
by reading it yourself.

Marriage cannot change a single soul
from what he/she is at the core.
So what you’re really seeing now
Was actually there from before.

“Will my marriage to you be a sinking ship?”
I guess no-one will be this blunt;
But we’ve reached a time in earth’s history
Where I ask the hard questions up front.

We should warn our young people of predators,
and of parasites, looking to feed;
Thus preventing much bitter divorces;
For my couplets, there will be no need. 🙂

“A lazy man is wiser in his own view
than seven who can answer with sense.”
Do you think that marriage to such a one
will be without consequence?
— Proverbs 26:16

“A lying tongue hates its victims,
and a flattering mouth causes ruin.”
The Book of Proverbs has the wisdom we need
Preventing trouble, before we get in.
— Proverbs 26:28

“Wounds from a friend are received as well-meant,
but an enemy’s kisses are insincere.”
So instead of dwelling on external charms,
One should ask: ‘Are there good virtues here?’
— Proverbs 27:6

“Better to be poor and live an honest life
than to be crooked in one’s ways, though rich.”
If you decide on the wrong path here,
You’ll end up headlong in a ditch.
— Proverbs 28:6

“He who rebukes another, in the end,
gets more thanks than the flatterer.
Whoever robs parents and says ‘That’s not a crime!’
is comrade to the destroyer.”
— Proverbs 28:23, 24

Young person, build your house on rock,
and not by sandy streams;
Likewise, build marriage based on truth,
not fantasies and dreams.

“Don’t buy cat in bag…” the old folks say;
some good advice to follow.
Translation: Don’t buy something you haven’t seen,
And don’t marry someone you don’t know.

“Fake friends are like autumn leaves,
they’re scattered everywhere.”
If you want a never-ending winter,
You’ll marry one, my dear.
— Author unknown

“Excuses are merely nails used
to build a house of failure.”
Relationships sustained on these
are headed for disaster.
— American proverb

“Hard times create strong men
Strong men create good times,
Good times create weak men,
Weak men create hard times.”
— Author unknown

Every shortcut for Christianity leads
to a dead end, with spiritual drought.
It may seem ‘fun’ to speed down that road,
But eventually you have to walk out.

A coat protects you from the cold,
a raincoat from the rain;
a godly spouse can protect you
from marital stress and pain.

Before marriage, be sure to face
insecurities inside,
Else when you meet them up again,
they will be multiplied.

People go to med school to become a doctor…
Law school for those that magistrate;
But where are the schools for marriages?
Does that explain the high failure rate?

National flags for holidays,
and checkered for car races;
Red flags may be common these days,
but not me, in those spaces…

“The two shall become one.” The math
God gave originally;
But those who multiply instead
end up with seventy-three…
— Genesis 2:24

“Once a man, but twice a child”
With this quote I disagree:
It’s either one became a man,
or was stuck in puberty.

Character matters, my dear friends,
Without this you will lose.
Honesty, justice, self-control
and other such virtues.

Many in marital trouble now
saw red flags at the start;
Thus one should spot them from afar
And keep oneself apart.

Two ships can travel peacefully,
if they travel side-by-side;
And this applies to marriage too
if love is to abide.

Tips for personal growth? Well here’s a list:
Start with eating healthy.
Get wisdom from experienced folks,
And throw out your TV.

Narcissism is a red flag
One of a deeper hue;
If one has extreme love for him/herself
There’s no love left for you.

Modern interpretations of the phrase “Don’t judge!”
Are as useful as styrofoam.
But you’d better judge well the person with whom
You share your life and your home.

Red apples are nice, a tasty fruit,
red muscadine grapes are great!
But red flags? Got no time for that…
I remove them from my plate.

Obscuring personal history
is a red flag: don’t ignore;
For future actions are generally based
on what was done before.

One who praises, then devalues you
is someone to avoid;
Best get off that see-saw early
Lest you become a schizoid.

Young person, to you my
poems are directed;
Get wisdom… get knowledge…
and keep you heart guarded.

Long-term diets based on short-term cravings
is a cause for disease today;
Long-term marriage based on short-term feelings
is a cause for heart decay.

Character disorders are rampant now
in modern society;
and many are going undiagnosed,
but can threaten your sanity.

Frequent doses of honesty
can open blinded eyes:
“At fault was my own fantasies,
bolstered by cute white lies.”

The inability to say sorry,
and make amends for wrong;
Avoid this red flag like a plague,
and sing a happier song. 🙂

Most times, my advice to the inexperienced:
“Put your marital dreams on a shelf.
First get virtues that make for a capable spouse,
and a better understanding of yourself.”

Good virtues exceed silver and gold,
they appreciate with time;
Just get a friend who possesses these…
it will change your paradigm.

Don’t gauge spousal prospects on physical things;
rather gauge as a long-term friend,
For when beauty, strength and charm depart,
A friendship you will have in the end.

Let’s share our wisdom with the youth,
Give them good stratagems:
Do not conjoin yourself with one
with chronic “I”-problems.

In no marriage is there a need
to show one disrespect;
And where it rears its ugly head,
is potential shipwreck.

So much heartache is birthed when
one conjoins with a stranger:
A life of dread, regret, remorse…
and constant fear of danger.

“Life is hard!” Yes, I agree,
it is a constant struggle;
But mediocre thinking makes
it much harder to juggle.

Some look for a trustworthy spouse
in which they can confide;
Others are looking for a horse,
One on which they can ride.

Young man, now listen carefully:
You only have one life.
Your future could be bright or dark
by your choice of a wife.

Red flags should be avoided;
here’s another flag to shun:
Unwillingness to apologize
for wrongs that have been done.

What can be done for our young persons
To give them a fighting chance?
They need someone who can lead them,
One to shake them from their trance.
(Thanks Serena!)

The hundredth of my couplets!
I hope they’ve shared insight;
Good relationships are determined
by choices sound and right.