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April 19, 2015

April 19th – “Character Matters”

Categories: Biblical

Today is April 19th… an important day in the life of the author. I commemorate this day by sharing resources/information that will benefit persons who are in abusive, one-sided relationships.

I understand the need to be loved, et cetera; but far too often, people jump from the frying pan into the fire. They follow their feelings… then wake up one morning to discover themselves in an abusive, dead-end relationship.

So Uncle Brent will share with you some tips from the trenches, and from the excellent research that is available on the topic of Character Disturbance (see Resources below). The principles are applicable across the entire spectrum: from platonic friendships to marriages.

Straight Talk

• Do not stand for lies, cheating and infidelity in relationships.
• Do not condone manipulative tactics in relationships. (http://manipulative-people.com/)
• Character Matters. There is no substitution for honesty, integrity, modesty. “Well, he/she makes me smile…” Really?? A puppy makes me smile…
• Ask direct questions, and get direct answers. Hiding information is a red flag.
• It’s better to be alone by yourself, than to be alone with someone else. You’d better believe it.

Wise Sayings

• “You can’t get figs from thistles.” (Matthew 7:16)
• “Get wisdom… get understanding.” (Proverbs 4:7)
• Whoever hides hatred has lying lips, And whoever spreads slander is a fool. (Proverbs 10:18)
• “Better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and angry woman.” (Proverbs 21:19)
• “A prudent man foresees evil and hides himself, but the simple pass on and are punished.” (Proverbs 22:3, Proverbs 27:12)

Other Resources

• ‘Manipulative People’ blog (http://manipulative-people.com): Excellent resource! Dr. George Simon presents great insight on his blog: he shows the tenets of Character Disturbance (Narcissism, entitlement, et cetera); allowing persons to understand the dynamics of manipulative persons, and going further to equip persons with strategies to deal with them. His books are also excellent: In Sheep’s Clothing, Character Disturbance, and The Judas Syndrome. He has an Internet radio programme named “Character Matters” – it airs on Sundays at 7pm (EST): http://ucy.tv/Default.aspx?PID=96&T=Character+Matters .
• Divorce Minister (http://www.divorceminister.com/en/): Divorce Minister truly has my respect. Rather than beat around the bush, this pastor calls out cheating, infidelity, et cetera as being untenable in marriage.

Thorns and snares beset the way of the stubborn;
he who values his life keeps his distance from them.
— Proverbs 22:5 (CJB)